Sodor Island Parody Pack

Thomas and Trevor

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Trevor the traction engine enjoys his work at the vicarage orchard very much. Which is just as well really, considering nobody else would have him. But sometimes he doesn't have enough work to do, and gets bored. He's a workaholic.
Edward stops by the orchard everyday and listens to Trevor complain. "I do like to be kept busy," said Trevor one morning, "And I do like company, especially children's company."
"Shut up!" snapped Edward, his patience finally broken by days of hearing Trevor moaning. "Ah, I mean, cheer up, Trevor," he said quickly, in a happy tone of voice. "The Fat Controller would like you to help with his new harbour. I guess the Vicar's already agreed, and Jem Cole must already be there or something."
"Ah!" smiled Trevor. "A harbour, the seaside, children! That would be lovely"
"Er, I didn't say anything about the seaside," Edward tried to explain, but Trevor wasn't listening.

Somehow Trevor was put on a flatbed truck and coupled to Edward, who took him towards the harbour. There they stopped to meet Thomas, who was to take Trevor the rest of the way. He was carrying a load of steel pilings.
"Thomas, this is Trevor. He's a traction engine," said Edward.
Thomas eyed the newcomer doubtfully. "That guy's not in traction at all. What are you on about Edward?"
"No, I'm a traction engine. I run on roads instead of rails," explained Trevor. "Will you take me to the harbour please? I'm eager to start work."
"Er, yeah, sure," said Thomas, but he was still puzzled. An engine that doesn't run on rails? he thought.
Some workmen coupled Trevor to Thomas' train. Rather than do the easy thing and have Thomas move forward, then back onto Trevor's truck, they decided to pull Trevor back down the track then push him onto the back of the train. It took a long time, but they finally managed to do it. As a result they all suffered back problems which never really healed and left them in agony for years, but since they're only workmen we shan't concern ourselves with them.
Anyway, Thomas took Trevor to the harbour. He was still wondering how an engine could run on a road.
"I'm glad the Fat Controller needs me," said Trevor. "I enjoy my work, but sometimes I run out of things to do, even though I can work anywhere. In orchards, on farms, at scrapyards, even harbours," he boasted. Alright Trevor we get the message. You can work anywhere, fine. Geeze. Hey, I can work anywhere too, but you don't hear me bragging about it. Hey, I think I've worked out why Trevor was sent to the scrapyard. His master got fed up of him talking all the time.
Sorry. That was uncalled-for. It's just, I don't really like people who talk all the time about nothing in particular. And that's what Trevor's doing here. It's my problem though, and I'm sorry for interrupting. Let's continue.
"Did I mention that I can work anywhere?" asked Trevor.
"But you don't run on rails!" said Thomas, failing to understand. "Run on rails, you do not! Rails you do not run on! Run not you rails! Rails not run you on!"
"Er, yeah. I'm a traction engine, remember? Why can't you understand? I'm like Bertie the bus or Terence the tractor."
"Speaking of Terence, this story reminds me of..."
But before Thomas could continue, they had reached the harbour. Boy was it in a mess. Really. I mean, I used to think my bedroom/loft was a mess, but it's nothing compared to this. Like a tornado hit the place, I'm telling you. I'm tempted to say it was causing confusion and delay, but that's just a cheap way to get a laugh nowadays so I shall refrain myself.
"Whoa, this place is a mess," said Thomas' driver. "Can you help clear the place up Trevor? These steel pilings must get through. I mean, a harbour without steel pilings? That's something I don't want to think about."
"Just the sort of job I like," said Trevor. "Now you'll see just how useful I can be."
Unfortunately Thomas left the harbour to get some children, so he didn't see Trevor (and Jem Cole, who mysteriously appeared from nowhere. My guess is he has an underground network he can use to get to anywhere on Sodor). Trevor pulled various bits of things from one place to another, so that when he was finished, although there was still a lot of mess, it was a lot more organised. Organised mess? That's an oxymoron if ever I heard one.

When Thomas came back he brought Annie and Clarabel, who were carrying lots of children kidnapped from various schools around Sodor. Trevor took these children for rides around the harbour, which I think is a bit unsafe but then again what do I know?
"He's very kind," said Annie, who even though she hadn't talked to Trevor just knew these sorts of things.
"He reminds me of the time Thomas met Terence," said Clarabel.
"At least I don't have to run into a snowmound this time," said Thomas.
 
Everyone was sorry to see Trevor leave, especially Trevor, who started to cry.
Pansy, thought Thomas. "Cheer up," he said. "The Vicar has plenty of work for you now, since in the time you've gone the whole orchard has gone into disarray, and I'll take you back here someday too."
"Oh, thank you," said Trevor. "That would be lovely."
Now Thomas and Trevor are good friends, and Thomas now knows that traction engines run on roads, not rails.

Years later
"Thomas meet Fergus, the steam traction engine."
"Why do they do this to me? Everything I know is a lie! A lie!"

Sodor Island Parody Pack